When you were small children, you could behave in a very different way to how you do now. When as a small child you ran and leapt on grandma, grandma was delighted and gave you love. When you stumbled and fell on the coffee table, you hurt yourself and had to be cuddled.
What would happen now if you ran and leapt at grandma, or fell onto the coffee table. Think of other things in which you can/must behave differently (more responsibly/ with restraint) now you are much bigger and stronger.
I always think about how growing older is constantly changing the dos and don'ts in my life and I find I commonly have no choice except to mourn them and move on. At a time in my life where my mom would constantly bug me about my food choices, study habits, and health, I not only took these things for granted- I yearned for a time where I would become more independent, free from the constant "ball and chain"(my mother). Ugh. How wrong I was. How very very wrong. Nowadays, I feel like a spider-spawn, ridded of my parents and at the verge of getting eaten by them. It feels that my parents want to teach me a lesson, every time I find myself lost in a situation- drowning as I search for the distant surface. I must say, that although this comes with obvious perks... the dramatic side of me feels neglected to some extent.
In contrast to the times where my mom would cater to most of my needs including my meals, reminding and even forcing me to take my medication, organising my timetable and after school activities, and basically all that motherly-stuff, I now find that taking care of yourself is hard work. I mean, do I seriously need to remember when I have to feed myself now?!
Nah, I'm kidding. My mom wasn't even always that attentive to my needs, but in a positive way- my mom takes pride in the fact that she never helped us with our homework like a lot of moms do, and never sort of spoiled us in any way. I guess that's good because, despite the fact that I'm older and it's different, it's not that much different- and I totally still run into my grandma's arms, who cares if I fell into the coffee table or not. My grandmas my bestie, last week she sent me a perfume from Brazil called "Dahlia Noir" which means the black Dalia, 'cause she's just awesome like that. And thoughtful. And I'm her favourite plus we look like each other.
In contrast to the times where my mom would cater to most of my needs including my meals, reminding and even forcing me to take my medication, organising my timetable and after school activities, and basically all that motherly-stuff, I now find that taking care of yourself is hard work. I mean, do I seriously need to remember when I have to feed myself now?!
Nah, I'm kidding. My mom wasn't even always that attentive to my needs, but in a positive way- my mom takes pride in the fact that she never helped us with our homework like a lot of moms do, and never sort of spoiled us in any way. I guess that's good because, despite the fact that I'm older and it's different, it's not that much different- and I totally still run into my grandma's arms, who cares if I fell into the coffee table or not. My grandmas my bestie, last week she sent me a perfume from Brazil called "Dahlia Noir" which means the black Dalia, 'cause she's just awesome like that. And thoughtful. And I'm her favourite plus we look like each other.
You're her favorite? i don't think so dahlia noir... what about @lamis@ghassan@tita ???
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